Communication plays an important role in any divorce – even if the divorce is contentious. Amid this conflict, there is much that spouses must address as they divide their assets and their lives. Therefore, it is all the more important to be aware of how you communicate, so you can protect yourself.
Typing? Talking? Take extra care.
Ending a marriage with someone you were once close with leads to a rise in many emotions. Left uncontrolled, it can be all too easy to let an accusation or an insult slip. Managing your emotional responses is the first step in a high-conflict divorce. That is a key factor to help you remain civil in any interactions with your ex-spouse.
Why is this so important? Because any written or spoken communications can be used against you in the divorce proceedings. This includes:
- Electronic communications, such as text messages, emails or direct messages
- Social media posts referencing a spouse or certain events
- Spoken or recorded conversations
In North Carolina, only one party involved in the conversation has to consent to a recording – and that can very well be the recorder. There is a risk, especially in a high-conflict divorce, where a spouse might purposefully try to get a rise out of the other and record them, so they can have the advantage.
It is especially important for divorcing parents to think before speaking, to protect their parental rights in the custody negotiations. While you know from previous blog posts to avoid badmouthing your ex-spouse in front of your children, you should also choose your words carefully online and in person, when speaking with your spouse.
It will take practice and time to adjust your communication style with your ex-spouse, throughout your divorce and even after you finalize it. Consider the steps for effective digital communication we have discussed in the past, and build your communication strategies moving forward.