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Tips for digital communication with an ex-spouse

On Behalf of | Jun 15, 2023 | Divorce |

Communicating with a soon-to-be-ex-spouse can be incredibly difficult as you work through the process of ending your marriage. Yet, communication is also one of the most important things, especially when parents divorce.

Many find it easier to communicate via text or email during and after a divorce. That way, it is easier to keep their emotions out of the exchange. However, it is still important to approach this form of communication with care.

3 things to remember when texting or emailing an ex-spouse

Different North Carolina families may benefit from different strategies. However, here are some common, critical tips to communicate better through text or email with your ex-spouse:

  • Remain professional: Write your messages as if you were speaking with a coworker. Keeping a professional and business-like tone can prevent you from letting your emotions dictate your communication. Feeling these emotions – whether they involve anger, frustration, grief or any combination of these – is completely normal. However, keeping your messages neutral and professional can help you avoid potential disputes. Even if your ex-spouse’s messages are hostile or rife with emotion, you should always make sure your responses are professional.
  • Be efficient: Your messages should be succinct and straightforward. Make sure to provide your ex-spouse with the most relevant information. Even if there are many things you would like to address with your ex-spouse, you should organize and prioritize the most important things first to ensure nothing is overlooked. For example, if the primary point of the message is about your child’s behavior at school, you should stay focused on that topic instead of listing many other concerns or issues in the same message. This can help to avoid confusion.
  • Establish an etiquette: It might help to establish rules such as avoiding sending multiple messages per day and avoiding sending messages too early in the morning or too late at night. PsychCentral also points out many manipulative tactics to both watch out for and avoid when communicating with your ex-spouse.

Communicating is no easy task in a divorce. However, these tips can hopefully help to make it a little easier.