Divorce is not always easy – but neither is marriage. As couples know, marriage takes work from both sides, particularly when facing relationship challenges.
This truth is often why many people see divorce as a last resort. In turn, it is common for couples to wonder if it is possible to avoid a divorce and salvage what they have.
Can we save our marriage?
This is often the first thing people wonder when they come up against significant challenges and breaches in their marriage. It is a valid question as well. In fact, several sources suggest that couples should explore this option before they begin to consider divorce.
Even so, the answer to this question depends on the circumstances of your relationship. For example, there are a few instances when a marriage cannot be saved, including:
- The presence of any kind of abuse
- An unhealthy relationship
- Refusal to compromise on little and big things
However, if both spouses commit to resolving the conflict they face – and in turn, commit to their relationship – it could indeed be possible to work through certain challenges and save the marriage. In the case that both spouses wish to salvage their relationship, it is often beneficial to seek professional counseling.
Divorce is never the only option
Even if a marriage cannot be saved, divorce is not the only option couples have. You could move forward with:
- An informal, trial separation
- A physical separation
- Couples Therapy
A physical separation is a prerequisite to divorce in North Carolina. However, that does not mean couples have to take the step to file for divorce. This can leave the door open to a potential reconciliation in the future.
If couples do decide to separate but not divorce, it will take a considerable amount of preparation and planning. For example, it is often a good idea to establish a legal agreement about how you will share or divide assets, pay bills and arrange time with the children.
A final note: Divorce is not a failure
Saving a marriage is not always possible – or even advisable. People and relationships change, and those changes are not always compatible. Regardless, the end of a marriage is not a failure, whether or not you took steps to try and salvage it.