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of divorce in North Carolina

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My spouse asked for a divorce. What do I do?

Perhaps a couple has faced troubles in their marriage for a while now. Or, the spark in the relationship is gone.

Then, one spouse says they want a divorce. Whether this comes as a shock or not, hearing the words out loud can be overwhelming.

Here are a few tips – the do’s and don’ts – of what to do in this situation.

1. Remain calm and civil

In the moment, it can be easy to let the negative emotions swell up and lash out in confusion, fear or anger. This only serves to make the situation more stressful and difficult for both spouses.

Remaining civil might be challenging – even if both individuals agree that the marriage is over. However, it is important to remember that deciding to divorce is not easy for either party.

It is possible to delay detailed conversations about the divorce for now, and it is often helpful to remove oneself from the situation and keep a level head.

2. Give yourself time

Along those lines, spouses should ask for time to think about how they want to move forward. This allows some time and space for both spouses to:

  • Work through their emotions and thoughts;
  • Consider what they want, and their goals for the future; and
  • Explore other opportunities and solutions if they are a possibility.

This can help ensure spouses approach the conversation with a clear head. It might help to reach out and discuss the situation with a trusted loved one, though it is critical to avoid gossiping or badmouthing the other spouse in these situations.

3. Educate yourself

No one likes to be faced with the unknown or uncertainty. So, it can help to reduce one’s stress if they learn more about the details of divorce in North Carolina. For example, it might help to take time to understand:

  • Individual’s rights when pursuing a divorce;
  • How the property division process works; and
  • The different options available to end a marriage.

Preparing and understanding precisely what could be ahead can help individuals feel more confident and discuss the divorce with logic instead of reactive emotions.