When people divorce, the marriage may not be the only relationship going through a dramatic change. Oftentimes, there are other people who may no longer be a good fit in your life, either.
As such, a divorce can be a good time to revisit these relationships to determine which ones continue to be valuable and which ones you may want to terminate. Some examples of these follow below.
- Your social network – Friendships can go through a significant transition in the wake of someone’s divorce. You may have shared friends who don’t want to take sides, people who prefer to stay close with your ex and those who are committed to you and your well-being. Don’t assume you must cut out everyone or try to hold on to all your friendships. Consider whether they are fulfilling and meaningful to you, then let go of the ones that are not. This can also involve unfriending or unfollowing these parties on social media.
- Your financial adviser – Seeking a fresh financial perspective can be wise during a divorce, especially if you were the financially dependent party in your marriage. As this article notes, this could mean finding an accountant and/or financial adviser who does not also work for your ex. The professionals you used during your marriage may have been a good fit for your situation then, but as a single person with different assets and new goals, it may be wise to find someone else who can focus on your individual needs.
- Casual connections you made through your ex or ex-in-laws – Think about all the people you encounter because of your ex or former in-laws. This might be your auto mechanic, a trainer at the gym, insurance agents, dentists and others who you started seeing only because of that connection. Unless they are trusted people in your life, you may want to find alternatives. Cutting ties with these acquaintances can prevent uncomfortable conversations with them and avoid the potential for running into your ex.
After years of thinking about your needs and goals as part of a married couple, it can be difficult to start thinking in terms of what you need and want for your life as an individual. However, by reconsidering your relationships, you can surround yourself with people who support you and can help you focus on the future.